I’ve decided that beginning tomorrow, May 1, I am embarking on a campaign of petty annoyance. I will tweet, daily, one complaint about any of the number of consumer products in which I am routinely disappointed. Big places, little places – anyone who gets (or has gotten) my goat will be fair game. I’ll keep track of it all, respond when I’m responded to and make a general nuisance of myself.
Why? Why not. I’m good at complaining, and there are limitless things to complain about. I’ll try to make it entertaining, but my main goal is to waste the time and resources of the crappy places that I complain about. It’s nothing personal (except when it is,) and I hope to have a little fun and propagate my ill will upon the Twitterverse.
I decided that I would start with McDonald’s – and I started this morning. I posted about how the McGriddle sucks. I was nice. I compared it to an Adam Sandler flick – interesting at first, but ultimately tasteless and lame. Nothing bad, no curse words, nothing “attacking.” I went back to check on it, and my tweet was gone.
So – I posted the same thing, more or less. And – 3 minutes later, the second tweet was gone as well.
Why was this removed? Why was I censored? For my opinion? If so – Twitter has some explaining to do. They allows misogynistic, hateful and ignorant stuff all over the place, but – complain about a crappy sandwich, and you get pulled?
I see a few scenarios:
- McDonalds is powerful, and they have a direct line to Twitter. If this is the case, I think there should be disclosure. Who got my post pulled and what was their rationale?
- Twitter is specifically pulling posts for complaining about McDoo. Why? I can make all the racist comments I want, but if I talk critically about a multi-billion dollar pusher of crap food, tweet gets killed. Hypocritical much?
- My account was hacked and ONLY those posts were deleted. Probably Russians.
Personally, I think it’s #1, all day long. And if so, that’s wrong. Plain and simple – wrong.
Game on, Twitter. Game on, McDoo. In the words of the late great Rusty Shackleford, “I am your worst nightmare! I have a three-line phone and plenty of time to kill!”
I’ll be complaining about every menu item. At least once per day, and I will keep track of what gets deleted and what stays. I will contact and pester Twitter until I get an answer as to why my posts were pulled. I will waste more of their time than I waste of my own.
I feel like I owe it to humanity to use my God-given gift of irritation to better the planet for all of us. Follow the idiocy on Twitter.
Oh – and the McGriddle sucks.
Image from Shutterstock. Not endorsed or affiliated with McDonalds or their crappy food. Also, for the record, I worked at McDonalds for a summer when I was in college, so I’m an expert.