Here’s as Much as I Want You to Know About Me

If I Had a Penny for Every Time I Had to Answer the Door, I’d Have Five Pounds Sixty-three.

Who Are You?

I am a slightly out-of-focus international conspiracy, and a law unto myself.

What Do You Do?

I tend a small cloning operation and a questionably legal dinosaur farm.

How Did You Get Here?

I was pod, delivered to a healer of people and a man of music, brought to Asheville to live a life sentence in this (reasonably glorious) suit of meat.

Where Are You Going?

Anywhere my Dolphin will carry me.

Where Have You Been?

Home, which is a few million light years after you make a right around Orion and punch through the veil.

How Often Have You Been There?

Often enough to know.

What Did You See When You Were There?

Nothing that doesn’t show.

What Your Favorite Thing About Your Job?

What job?

What Do You Endorse?

Coffee, salt, Carl Angel-5 pencil sharpeners, hallucinations, conscious thought.

What Do You Love?

My single interdimensionally intertwined traveler. Without that spirit, I would return to that dark place I lived before time.

Should You Be Concerned?